Hi all!
I (F/5'9'/SW: 210/CW: 163/GW: 145) have lurked around here daily since the start of my weight loss (last november), but never felt the need to post until now. I could really use some advice from the great loseit community on how to deal with negative feelings about the past and regrets over my former (fatter) self.
The reason for this is that I tried on some of my old pants today, and they were absolutely huge. I was just so shocked at the size of them and how big they were (read: how big I used to be). I was looking in the mirror at myself and I remembered when I bought them. I was looking for shorts and ended up crying in the dressing room because none of them would fit me. All of my skinnier friend were wearing these denim shorts and we were all going on a trip together, so I really wanted similar denim shorts. In the end, I had to go to this expensive plus size store find shorts in my size.
Now, I am left with a bunch of shorts/ pants from that store that I don't fit anymore. While I was purging my closet, I just got so sad seeing all these clothes that are too big now. Sad because they were expensive, but mostly because they remind my of how awful I felt during that time. That I couldn’t just buy cheap shorts like all my friends, but I had to buy expensive special shorts, that were less cute. I remembered how awful I felt in my body during that entire period of my life. And I found myself crying over past me, who hated her body so much. I feel so bad for my younger self, and find myself full of regret over the past. Does anyone relate to this or had a similar experience trying on clothing from when you were bigger? Advice on how to accept your past and/or let go of the regrets would be greatly appreciated!
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