I have gained more than 25 pounds from literally just filling my time with eating. I am busy. When I’m stressed or when I have literally any minute that isn’t work or school, I am eating something. I eat until I’m stuffed.
I will be eating something (when I’m not even hungry) and think “eat this. Eat this. Eat this.” I also think “stop eating. Tomorrow you will start your weight loss journey. Tomorrow you’ll work towards your goals.” I see pictures of myself now and am disgusted. I start crying. I’m so unhappy with the way I look. I know it’s repetitive and I’m not new to the club but it’s still very hard.
I’ve tried body positivity and accepting how I look but this isn’t the real me. I feel like my obsessive eating is a problem and not something I should celebrate or love about myself. I’m miserable. It’s not even a body image thing. It’s feeling full, getting fatter, messing up my insides by overeating, and sleeping all the time. I have no energy to work my demanding nursing job. I get home and drink (1-3 drinks every couple nights), then eat. Then cry. Then go to sleep.
If anyone can help, with any advice on how to truly get started and get my life back... I’d really appreciate it. I don’t even know what I’m doing here or what I’m asking for but I guess I just need some initial guidance. I want a healthy body that will allow me to enjoy life and not feel like a sad, slobby mess every night. I deserve it. Don’t we all?
Thank you in advance.
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