We are F24 and M24. We agreed to both try to lose weight around february this year, after we got a bathroom scale and realised how big we had both gotten.
My boyfriend has done incredibly well but I actually gained weight until August.. I didn't pay my weight enough attention because I was finishing university. I've now lost 9lbs since then. My weight now is 248lbs (I'm 5'10). I know it's bad.
He is now down to 169lbs and he's 6'2. He started this year at 290 so he's done incredibly well and I'm very proud of him. He is very confident and active now. I do feel a bit left behind.
I get ashamed and depressed at the comparison between us. My boyfriend is now traditionally attractive and gets a lot more attention. I can see the look on people's faces like "she's your girlfriend" . It kills me inside.
He is also quite rude about my weight sometimes... he called me an "absolute unit" in bed once and it was meant to be a "joke" but it hurt because he knows I hate being fat and tall. He also tells me I'm "crushing him" whenever we have sex. Maybe I am but he acts like I'm this gigantic whale sometimes.
I tried to go running with him the other day and he wouldn't stay at a slow enough pace and when I tried to catch up he made fun of my heavy breathing. I feel so ugly and worthless.
I know I should have put more effort into my weight loss earlier in the year but now I just feel depressed about it all the time. I told my bf this and he just said "when I was depressed I stopped eating and then when I lost weight I was happier" so basically he just thinks I should stop eating and it would fix the problems? When I'm depressed my urge is to binge eat and now when I eat bad things I have to hide it from him.
Yesterday he was in a grumpy mood all day. I was on my period so I wore some big granny panties, he made fun of how huge they were for ages and asked if it was the same ones tammy from 1000lb sisters wears (she's this 600lb woman on this trashy show we watched together).
He can be so insensitive sometimes without meaning to, but I think he actually might want to hurt me with all these digs about my weight.
He was supposed to make dinner for us yesterday. He made a normal portion for himself but an extremely tiny portion of salmon and salad for me. I asked if he was serious and he said "yes I weighed it out, it's a 150 calorie meal, I thought you were losing weight". I was like "yes but I've had 1100 calories and my calorie goal is 1800"
He was in shock at that number and was like WOW you're a woman why do you need that much, I only need 1500, etc. He made this big show of taking out all the unhealthy food out of the fridge and putting it in front of me. He was saying "I suppose you need all this since you can't handle being hungry for one evening" He called me ungrateful for "complaining about the food".
I felt so ashamed and cried and left him alone for a bit. He apologised later but I'm hurt. I also feel guilty I pushed him to this point. I want to lose weight so bad. I know I'll be happier and he will be more into me again. I feel like he resents me sometimes.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/3o0jrd8
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