Tuesday, April 21, 2020

Heartbreak Weight Loss

So I’ve been struggling with my weight since I turned 13. I’m 20 now (and female if that matters) and I’ve started to sort of get a hang of this health and weight loss thing.

In the beginning of 2019 I weighed 105 kilos and due to a serious stomach bug I was pushed to lose about 5 kilos in a week. Long story short that motivated me to keep going once I got better and eat right plus start going to the gym. In a year I lost about 15 kilos.

When this quarantine hit I’ve had absolutely no motivation to work out at home and I’m starting to go back to my old ways in ordering way too much take out but I’ve managed to keep myself balanced and not gain anymore weight but not lose any either.

Well in the middle of all this my boyfriend of a year and a couple months decided now was a perfect time to call me and tell me he doesn’t love me anymore and hasn’t loved me for a few months. A fantastic decision since I’m stuck in my house where we have the majority of our memories together and I can’t leave. It left me completely heartbroken.

Its true that the fastest way to lose weight is to have your heart completely shattered. Its been a really shit few days. The first day I wanted to just eat absolutely all my feelings away since food has always been my comfort. I figured this is it I’m going to gain all the weight back from eating my feelings. Well, apparently not. After the first day of eating everything all of a sudden on the second day I didn’t feel like eating anything. All I felt was sad and empty. I wasn’t hungry. It’s been 5 days now and I’ve not felt a single craving or feeling of hunger.

I eat one meal a day because my mom forces me to and that’s about it. I’ve dropped 3 kilos in 5 days. I know this isn’t healthy. I just could really use some advice right now on how to get my shit together without starving myself unintentionally or binging.

Thank you

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