Creating a Habit Loop for Healthful Eating -- How I lost 50 Pounds This Year

• Conclusion first -- I want to start with the conclusion first. What worked for me is to get to a point where I only ate when my body gave me hunger cues and stop eating when I am full. That is way easier said than done. It took me all year to get to this position.
• About me -- I am mid 30s. My starting weight is 250, I am 5'10, and I am now 200. I don’t have any metabolic issues (no thyroid issues, no diabetes, no insulin resistance that I know of) and followed CICO. I had about a 500 calorie deficit per day.
• Tools used -- I used Macro Factor to log in my calories, to track my weight (to give me a weekly average), and it recalibrated what my daily calorie budget was based on my weight loss.

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• Steps I took.
  • It starts out with creating a habit loop. This part is the tl;dr of 2 really great books (1) The Power of Habit by Duhigg and (2) Unwinding Anxiety by Brewer.
    • People think will power is the key because the unsaid assumption is that people are thinking machines that sometimes feel. The problem with this view point is that brain science shows that people are feeling machines that sometimes think. The same part of your brain that does fight/flight/freeze can turn off the part of your brain that is responsible for will power.
    • Most of your behavior can be classified as a habit. A habit has 3 parts: cue, a behavior/routine, and a result (reward).
      
    • Anxiety is a habit loop: the cue can be from the environment, boredom, etc. It usually goes like this: Trigger - Stress; Behavior - Worry; Result - Avoidance/Distraction. But, sometimes worrying can be its own trigger. The anxiety is your brain's way of making you do something about having incomplete information.
    • Having this habit loop on means your body is super stressed all the time. It means you will have a decline in cognitive functioning. It can actually make you sick.
  • Applied to eating:
    • I took a note of everything I ate. When I ate it. How I felt before. How i felt after. I did this for 2 weeks. The trick is to not change your behavior just because it's being recorded!
    • What I discovered is how often I ate when the cue wasn't hunger. In fact, it was hardly at all. A lot of social cues (someone brought in donuts). A lot of stress cues. A lot of boredom cues.
    • What I did with this information: The How I felt after part of the exercise was the most eye opening. So many times I actually felt crappy. Eat a snickers bar, get a stomach ache. Eat a donut, feel nautious.
    • This shifted into mindfulness. I started to chew slower. When I ate only when I was hungry, I also made sure I savored the food. I would take mental notes about textures, flavors, etc. What I realized is that hyper palatable foods (e.g. McDonalds) actually tended to be too salty, didn't taste as good as I would expect or remember later when a craving hit.
  • Power of disenchantment.
    • Anytime I'd be triggered by golden arches or other bad habits, I'd remember how it actually made me feel. I remembered how it actually tastes. Over time, my brain naturally stopped being triggered by that cue because I realized it just wasn't doing it for me.
    • As far as boredom/stressed eating. Before I snacked, I always would ask myself: Am I hungry or bored? Hungry or stressed? I found replacement behaviors for some of the things. If bored, do something fun or do a quick chore. Or call a friend. That really brightened my day.
  • Power or processing negative emotions.
    • So, I can't say enough about this YT channel on processing emotions. The TLDR: Think about when you were a kid, your earliest lesson on emotional processing might be "don't cry or I'll give you something to cry about" from a tired parent that were doing their best. We are taught a lot of avoidance behaviors but not a lot of how to process your emotion. This YT channel explains it all way better than me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zoCiHlFjo04&t=3s
    • The TL:DR is that you are not your emotions. You are not your thoughts. One way to unwind bad habit loops is to be curious. In addition to the YT channel, Brewer's book referenced above gives a strategy called RAIN. You Recognize the stressor and relax into it. You Accept/Allow it to be there. Investigate body sensations/how you feel. Note what happens moment to moment.
    • This helped me reduce the amount of stresses that are actually cued so I don't even need replacement behaviors.
      
    • The biggest thing that a lot of us can struggle with is "all or nothing" thinking. Getting discouraged is part of a diet. But dealing with it is the difference. You can say "fuck it" or have a "cheat meal" that turns into a cheat day. Into your bad habits that got you fat in the first place. Don't let one "bad meal" turn into a week. You can't get fat on a single donut, but you can if your overall eating habits are bad.
  • Calorie deficit. Okay, so this was about losing weight after all. Now we're getting to the practical food part.
    • I had to calculate my maintenance calories. I use Macro Factor, an app. But you can use this to get started: https://tdeecalculator.net/. I knew I had to get to 500 calorie deficit for my overall goal.
    • You have to get a food scale. You have to use measuring spoons. When you start out, you truthfully can over estimate how many calories is in your food. Your regular spoon full of peanut butter isn't an actual table spoon.
    • You have to be precise in measuring what you eat. It takes a while to unwind the non-hunger cue part of your eating habits. It takes a while for your body to get used to what 1500 (1800, 1200, whatever your goal is) calories really means.
    • The thing is that you need to update it once a month or so. Your calorie budget will change as you get smaller!
  • Scale weight. Another issue is people will confuse scale weight with fat loss/gain. Your scale weight is everything. Your poop. pee. Your muscles. Your skeleton. If you also start working out when you diet, your body composition can change. You can gain muscle while losing fat. Your body can retain water in various ways. Don't let a daily spike lose your momentum. Make micro adjustments if your week over week scale weight doesn't change. Also incorporate a tailor tape and measure your waist and chest, maybe your hips, etc. Log those somewhere.
  • Cooked most of my meals. So when I had 1500 calories, and I was becoming more mindful, I knew I had precious real estate.
    • I liked this habit of eating: Breakfast (usually smaller), snack, lunch, snack, and a bigger dinner. I usually liked light breakfasts and lunches. My first snack is usually a premier protein drinks I got from costco. My second is usually fruit.
    • So, that usually meant dinner is 500-600 calories per serving. I eat a lot of sheet pan recipes. They typically are a lean protein + leafy green. But you can get really tasty ass food.
    • The timing of snacks/meals has to do with hunger. So if I'm not hungry in the morning, I don't eat. If I'm not hungry in the afternoon, I don't eat. Packing the food at work isn't an obligation for me.
  • Going out to eat. So, sometimes I can look at the menu and ensure it's 500-600 calories. But some menus aren't as good. Usually look for stuff that's blanched, steamed, grilled. Avoid things that are fried, battered, etc. I usually get a lean protein + leafy green even at a resteraunt. If you have to do fast food, get taco bell "fresco style," chick fila, try to substitute fruit for fries.
  • 8 hours of restful sleep. This goes hand in hand with anxiety reduction. But if your body is stressed, your flight/flight/freeze reflexes are up, it also impacts your digestion. Also, stress hormones can cause your body to maintain fat reserves (insulin+cortisol are among those). You can't be chronically stressed and lose weight consistently. You will be chronically stressed if you aren't getting 8 hours of restful sleep. If you get 8 hours but it isn't restful, refer to the anxiety reduction techniques above. But also look at a sleep specialist. Sleep apnea for example is super under diagnosed.
  • If you snack, make it count. I make low calorie snacks. Low butter/salt popcorn is the bomb. I also love pickles. A lot of fruits, vegetables, etc., make fun mindless snacks for the times you just want to have a snack at a movie or whatever. You won't get fat on snap peas. But they have a delightful crunch and it's fun to snack.
  • Get rid of the "clean plate club" mentality. You eat slowly. You savor each bite. Take note of the textures, flavors, etc. But you stop when you feel 3/4 full. If you toss food, that's fine.
• Menu planning. I think this an underrated aspect. Planning out the majority of what you eat will reduce a lot of your cues that lead you to subpar eating habits.
  • It doesn't take as long as you think. Every saturday, my wife and I spend 2 hours in total in looking up recipes, shopping, etc.
  • It's just the 2 of us, but we basically plan on 3 meals. They will make left overs and sometimes lunches.
  • Sun/Mo, Tue/Wed, Thur/Fri, then treat ourselfs out for Saturday.
  • Breakfasts are usually the same for me. I like oat meal (you can dress it up in a variety of ways. I like pumpkin puree + pumpkin pie spice + honey, or walnuts + brown sugar, etc). Or omelets (you can make with a variety of veggies or spices).
  • Lunches are left overs or a salad. I like premade salads from costco.
  • Dinners will usually be from recipes. We have a variety of cookbooks but also look online. Sometimes will google "600 calorie, under 30 minutes" type stuff.
    • Sheet pan recipes are the best. https://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/photos/sheet-pan-recipes
    • It's how I got into parsnips. They're cheap but awesome roasted. Roasted veggies are great because you can fill up, lots of volume, without risking your waist line too much.
    • Soups are underrated as fuck. I usually get a soup for a full meal, especially when eating out.
• If you're new to cooking, get this book: https://www.saltfatacidheat.com/.
  • It will teach you how to make a balanced bite. You have to have all the elements of salt, fat, acids, and heat.
  • It will also teach you how to equip a basic pantry and kitchen. It makes cooking for yourself easier if you have basic skills. Recipes usually leave out how to season from their instructions, leading to bland ass food.
  • This book teaching you how/when to salt your food properly makes it worth the read alone.
• You will start really looking forward to your meals when you plan them out, actually. It's empowering to know that every meal will lead towards your overall weight loss goal.
• Try to have most of your meals on point, but enjoy yourself every now and then, but lot yourself enjoy things when you are dedicated to only eating when you're hungry. Otherwise you may risk binging (at least I did).

Where I'm going from here: Well, it is the holidays. My goal is to maintain my current weight. In January, I'll start another round of calorie deficit. My goal is to get to 180. The why I am losing weight is because I want to be able to be healthy and energetic for my future children. My wife is 11 weeks pregnant and I want to be the best possible father I can be and starting with better health is my compelling reason.

I think it's essential that you have self-respect and confidence in knowing that your health is worth it. You can get through the negative portions of dieting if the reason for your suffering is compelling enough. But everyone's values are different so literally looking/feeling better can be compelling IMO. You need to have things to help you from getting discouraged if your scale weight spikes up one day for a number of reasons that it may.

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