The shitstorm: I hate myself. My weight is constantly yoyoing, now I am going up and up. No motivation to exercise. No motivation to eat right. Lot of stress, no capacity for taking better care of myself. Since childhood I have been told by my parents that I am fat, haven't gotten any support from them regarding weight loss, so my self esteem is very low and this is very painful to me.
The boyfriend: our relationship is good, have been together 6 months, best relationship I have ever had, but he never compliments me, so I feel 10 times worse, cause it feels like he doesn't like anything about me (rationally this is not true). To make things worse (better), he is a coach and sports is his life and keeps making comments about how I should work out more (for health)
So I went extremely down yesterday and he is bad at communication and comforting me so it was a very long and terrible conversation and we got nowhere.
I figured I need to do this by myself, at least the emotional part for sure, with working out he helps. But the emotional side of it is so heavy, part of me would be much happier if it was the other way around. Today I ate right, no junk and went to the gym. I don't know if I can keep this up or will put my head in the sand and start binging again.
Thank you for reading this, I needed to vent. Let me know if you have any advice for me please.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/G5iXm2j
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