I don't like talking about my diet.

(Apologies in advance if this type of post doesn't belong here!)

I'm back on my weight loss journey after a one-month-long hiatus due to exam season & some mental health issues. This sub is a great motivator! But, now that I'm back on track, I'm reflecting on why I don't really like talking about dieting, particularly with those who haven't experienced it (healthily, at least).

I feel like talking about it always leads to one or more of the following:

• People giving unsolicitied advice. What's worse is that these same people usually don't have any idea what they're talking about.

My mom thinks that counting calories and measuring food "is too much" and useless, because she believes that I could achieve the same results if only I stopped eating after 6 PM, exercised more, and (my favorite) drank lemon water on an empty stomach each morning. However, she's also the person who (figuratively) pushes fatty meals down my throat regularly and encourages me to empty my plate despite me being full already. I really don't understand logic and at this point I try to avoid the topic entirely.

• People assuming you dislike / hate your current self. Some people (particularly those who might not like you much) will simply put on a pitiful look, as if you just told them you'd like to grow fairy wings or something. Others will hijack the conversation and turn it into one about their struggles with their body image, often in really negative ways ("lmao same i look like a whale!!"). This makes me really uncomfortable for the same reasons as the next scenario.

• People starting circlejerks about weight, weight loss, and how they wish they looked like XYZ celebrity. This one is especially true in all-female settings, at least in my experience. Here you'll get a combo of unsolicited advice, objectively thin people moaning about how fat they are, ideas of dubious or unhealthy weight loss methods thrown around nonchalantly ("fit tummy tea"), and worrying amounts of normalized self-hatred.

I found that these conversations don't really achieve anything, and, in fact, leave me feeling worse after. It makes me feel like no matter what I look like, I'll always find something to want to change about my appearance, just like them. Or that no matter how good I will ever feel about my looks, everyone, including women, will compare themselves and others to pictures that belong on /r/instagramreality. It leaves me feeling like there's no way to win this self-esteem game.

Luckily, my childhood best friend just lost a ton of weight (more than 40 pounds, I believe) and trying to lose some more, so I have her whenever I need a more down-to-earth approach to weight loss.

Has anyone experienced similar scenarios, or others as bad as them? Did it discourage you from talking about your journey?

submitted by /u/nicedog98
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