About 8 years ago, I hit my high weight, 285. A few things happened, creating the 'perfect storm' for weight loss. My mom had triple bypass that year, I had a neurological event that closely resembled a small stroke (from which I recovered 98%), I was facing my 40th birthday, and my oldest child was getting married. It took a while, but over time, I lost 133 pounds. I stayed at 152 for a while, was running every day and felt fabulous. Technically, I was 7 pounds over the top for my height, but it was ok. I felt good,and I felt like I looked good!
Then the divorce.....
I injured myself (broke my butt bone when I fell in my kitchen), and couldn't run. Then through the emotions of my divorce after a 24 year marriage, I ate my feelings, so to speak. I'm now in a much better place, happily re-married to someone who treats me with kindness rather than emotional abuse. However, I have regained almost 100 pounds of the 133 I lost. (Yes, I know-- Please don't judge me. God knows I judge myself enough.)
I'm trying hard to find that girl I was when I was losing all that weight, but try as I might, I'm having a tough time. I've tried cutting out sugar again, and I do great all day until my husband gets home and then all bets are off. (He is a serious sugar-fiend! He is not responsible for what I eat, but I have a hard time not joining him when he's drinking soda and eating poorly. ) This morning, I weigh 249 pounds at 5'4". I feel embarrassed and ashamed. I feel like I deserve to feel better, like my new husband deserves a healthy me, and like if I don't shed this weight, I won't live long enough to grow old with him. FWIW, I don't have any known medical issues, and I'm not on any daily meds.
I guess this is my restart post, a way of publicly stating my intention. Any advice on finding that motivation again?
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2Wk3Ec1
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