‘It’s Okay To Lie’.
Reverse Psychology To Build Trust.
A strange dynamic often develops with my weight loss patients.
Regardless of where you stand on the ‘calorie in < calorie out’ debate, documenting what you eat is critical to weight loss.
Surprisingly often, patients lie about what they eat.
There are several reasons, but here are a few common themes.
“I don’t want to disappoint you”.
“I don’t want to be judged.”
Despite advances in the patient-doctor relationship, patients feel deeply accountable to their physician.
Especially in journeys as collaborative as weight loss.
Often, the lying/hiding/fudging of the truth is uncovered when a patient hits a plateau.
We review their diet and exercise…and the numbers don’t seem to add up.
At this time I have to ask probing questions to diagnose the cause of the plateau.
Eventually, more often than not, it’s withholding the truth re: how much they eat or how much they exercise.
‘You know, it’s okay to lie’.
“It is?”
“Of course, I get it. It must be stressful trying to be perfect. I know, I’ve been there”
“You have?”
“Of course! Eating right? Staying away from your favorites? Exercising everyday? It’s tough! Sometimes, the only thing that motivates me is you guys!”
Hopefully we share a wonderful laugh.
“I just want you to know, that I’m not a corrections officer. I’m your guide through this journey. Only problem is my guidance is limited by the accuracy of the information you give me.”
“Regardless, until you trust me to help, you can keep lying” - making it clear I’m joking!
More often than not, the pressure to be perfect is diffused.
They know that I know.
They know that I am their guide, not an authority figure.
And what do you know, the missing calories magically appear 😀😀
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