I feel like I really need to write this post, not only for myself but for others that maybe be having a difficult time.
I (32F, 177cm/5ft10) have lost 60kg/132lbs total since December 2019. My starting weight was 163kg/359lb. My weight loss has slowed down within the past year. I have been pretty good at sticking with my good habits, tracking my food etc.
That all changed last week when I went on a holiday with my friend. I was worried about my diet but I let myself enjoy. Pizza, lamb kebab, hamburger.. I haven't eaten these foods in such a long time. I enjoyed them for the moment but since coming home I feel absolutely sick to my stomach. Dizzy, sore stomach, lethargic. And because it was recently Easter my mum has bought a large amount of chocolate eggs and bunnies. I found myself binging on those. I have barely binged in the last 3 years and I feel so disappointed in myself. I told mum that she has to hide that chocolate because I can't help myself and she doesn't seem to understand. Now she wants to go to an all you can eat pizza restaurant tonight. I told her that I'm trying to get back on track with my diet and I don't want to go because I don't think I can control myself. She doesn't understand how I am feeling about myself right now.
I came home and saw that the scale has gone up 2kg. I know it's probably just water weight after enjoying for the last week but I can't help feel down.
I am telling myself that it is okay. I just have to start and get back into it, no matter how hard it is. Because in the end, no one will do it for me.
What are your tips for holding yourself accountable and getting back on track? Also tips on not beating yourself up after a binge?
Sorry if my post is all over the place.. I just needed to let this out. I want to start feeling better again.
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