Friday, March 1, 2024

Should I report my female coworkers for consistently bullying me for my weight loss?

I’m a 28 year old woman who got up to 215lbs due to drinking, depression, and fast food. It’s taken me two years of sobriety and lifestyle changes, but I am now 130lbs at 5’8. I think because of the alcohol, I carried the weight horribly and was EXTREMELY bloated, especially in my face. I actually looked sickly. Now, I have never felt better in my life physically or mentally and my desire to drink is almost completely gone. I don’t need booze or McDonald’s to get dopamine anymore.

I’m a nurse, and many of my coworkers are the same weight I used to be. I don’t concern myself with other peoples weight and only noticed this because of their obsession with mine. I thought the novelty of my weight loss would get boring to them, but there are comments made every single day about it. For months. I’ve started to wear multiple layers of baggy clothes, but it doesn’t work, as evidenced by my coworker coming up to me, lifting up my shirt, and saying “wow look at your ribs!” in front of the entire floor of staff and patients. Here are some more examples of what is occurring on a daily basis:

-A female coworker casually asked me if I’m “starving myself” in front of my other coworkers -A female coworker grabbed my butt and told me I’m losing weight in the “wrong places” -Another female coworker told me that my “bra must be empty now” in front of my male colleagues -They will take food from our MANY potlucks and put it at my computer without asking -A female coworker said loudly “stand beside (another coworker) and lift up your shirts, I need to see which of you is more skinny” -A female coworker randomly told me that my boyfriend will leave me for a “real woman” after a patient had passed and I was just trying to get through my shift without crying -I was publicly asked by a female coworker if I “steal ozempic” I think it was a joke, but I don’t find these funny at work.

What I don’t understand, is that there are many women who are much slimmer than me. Yet they don’t receive this same attention publicly (that I have noticed). Maybe it’s because they have been slim their entire employment? Now, I am almost wondering if I should report this behaviour, or if that’s just being childish. I genuinely don’t know what to do and the social anxiety it’s giving me almost makes me want to drink again after my shifts. Luckily I am past that point, just not sure how to move forward. I appreciate any and all advice. If someone had told me two years ago I’d be upset at people commenting on my weight loss, I wouldn’t have believed you. But here I am.

I have been vocal in my responses to these comments, and have gotten some great advice from this sub on how to shut them down. Sadly no matter how vocal I am, it isn’t working in getting them to leave me alone.

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