M 38 YO, 5'6", from 278 lbs in Jan '19 to 229 this week. Lazy keto. Very occasional exercise.
Weight has been lost. Clothes fit differently, especially pants. Spending less frivolously on snacks & dessert.
And yet I don't feel good. My days are still disorganized. My social life is dying. Friends rarely/ever call. No dating, no relationships. Oh, and most wonderfully, unemployed forever.
I wasn't expecting a bit of weight loss to be a magical cure-all. But I was hoping at least to feel something good.
I thought I would feel better just seeing myself in the mirror. I don't. I'm still getting older, losing my hair. I still have a crooked nose and big ears. My teeth can generously be called "off-white".
I thought I might occasionally notice women noticing me in public. Some kind of positive attention. But I don't. Nothing.
I see a counsellor sometimes. Got depressed a couple years back. Had a scary incident on New Years Eve that made me take it seriously. But really... she has not been helpful.
I don't know what else to do. Wait until I lose more pounds? Maybe the magic happens when I hit 200? 180? I sometimes struggle with the simple "Why bother?" question. Why bother depriving myself of one of the few things in life (food) that provide me straightforward pleasure?
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2Oc7D8R
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