F / 23 / HEIGHT: 4'11" /149.86cm
CW: 148 lbs 48.8 KG | SW: 220LBs/99.79 KG | GW: 120 LBs/54 KG
Hello all! When I'd posted two years ago, I was immensely depressed, frustrated and at my lowest point.
If you don't feel like peeping my post history, I'll give a rundown:
At around age twelve, I was prescribed antipsychotic medications for a condition I ended up not even having. This isn't a psych subreddit, so I won't delve into that agonizing ordeal, but it turns out that my problem required therapy, NOT medication, and certainly not something so intense as an anti-psych.
Five years of abilify (with two of those being by injection, too!) later, and a complete overhaul of my diet, my body was ruined. I weighed over 120 pounds over the ideal weight for my height.
I went from eating literal garbage as a teenager, to starving myself in my early twenties, to eating consistently clean for a year, at pristine, weighed CICO.
I began to work out despite feeling exhausted. Why wouldn't the scale move?
I was eating at a healthy deficit, why wasn't I seeing a decline?
Sure, fluctuations happened, but after a meal, no matter how low-density or accurately weighed and measured, I'd climb several pounds over two days, only drop down once i'd beaten my appetite into submission and rest at an absolutely unsustainable caloric intake.
At my worst, I was taking in 600 calories a day, with a side of self loathing.
I was a burnt match; I wanted to scream into the void but was worried that people would accuse me of lying or not 'actually' eating in deficit a'la many posts around r/loseit in the same vein as the one i'd written before.
I made the decision to log off of online weight loss resources and book an appointment with a new doctor and explain my problem.
I lucked out; the most incredible doctor i'd had the pleasure of meeting with saw me that same month.
He was personable, empathetic and had experience with this sort of thing a handful of times, a few patients ago. We met with the intent to discuss weight loss as it's done by the books.
Surely, I was doing something wrong?
As soon as I mentioned why my weight began to climb, his face dropped.
He asked if I was constantly fatigued, I said yes. He asked about my final dosage of abilifiy, discussed my initial misdiagnosis. He looked at my calorie tracker and just shook his head. He ordered labs.
After collecting labs and realizing that evidently, I was not sustaining myself on Mcdonald's and fried Oreos, he decided to set me on track to get a gastric bypass.
With his referral, I made an appointment with a bariatric center a state over and got the ball rolling. It took six months. Continuous appointments With the guidance of healthcare professionals in remote-limbo talking me through nutrition education resources, I had my weight analyzed like coordinates to some nebulous mystery; as if it were a problem willpower couldn't break.
A little under a year ago, I got the procedure. It hasn't been easy. Even with therapy, it was hard to shake the feeling that I took the easy way out.
I worked hard. I am working hard. I tried my best, and it paid off; I've lost 80 lbs— I'm about 20 lbs away from my goal weight.
I am fit. I have some loose skin, but it's a reminder that i'm fucking doing it. Even if I needed medical help to begin; I tear it up at the gym, I stick with my diet, and I never, ever gave up and ate the tub of gelato. I'm losing a consistent 1-2 lbs and eating an appropriate amount for my GW.
Sometimes you just can't do it alone.
By all means, start with CICO. I just want to remind everyone that CICO isn't always a one-size-fits-all solution; especially when your body chemistry and hormones have been destroyed by an improper diagnosis and medication that's now a thorny nest of class-actions and complaints regarding long-term weight loss problems.
I apologize for how long this was, I hope it wasn't a slog, and I hope I can help anyone in a similar boat. I wanna add that this isn't to say CICO is bad or ineffective; sometimes you gotta dig a little deeper and get a Medical professional's opinion. You just might have been fucked over by big pharma, or something!
[link] [comments]
from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/uT9aeid
No comments:
Post a Comment