At my heaviest I was 240 lbs, which was hell on my 5’2” frame. I put in the work with dieting and exercise starting November 2018. I stopped going to the gym in April last year because depression/job had me running ragged 12 hours a day. I’ve still done a good job of maintaining since then, and have actually slowly lost and additional 15 lbs since then as well.
People compliment me on the weight loss and tell me I look good....but they don’t see me naked. I was pretty gross before, but I feel absolutely disgusting now. I should mention this was the 2nd time in the last decade I’ve had to go through the effort of losing 60 lbs. I was around 230-240 when I graduated high school and lost 60-65 lbs the summer after freshman year of college. After turning 21 I slowly gained it back and then some, was huge again by age 24. So between 26 & 27 I had to do it all over again. But my boobs are gross. They have lost most of their shape. They look acceptable in a bra but I feel so unattractive the second it comes off. My butt looks fat but somehow also flat at the same time. My stomach is starting to get this crinkle under my belly button where my stretch marks and slightly loose skin are starting to bunch up and be noticeable.
What’s really getting me though is my legs. The front of my thighs and my inner thighs look terrible. Like not even human skin looking. At least before losing the weight I didn’t have these weird craters around my junk...I’m so lonely but I can’t imagine ever getting naked in front of anyone ever again. I am extremely shy around men to begin with (thanks a lot, fat girl childhood) & but usually I am capable of faking confidence until I feel comfortable. Now I just feel like a fraud trying to flirt with guys. I’m just so upset that I still look like shit. I will never be able to afford cosmetic surgery. Anyone else’s legs look like this? This isn’t something that can be fixed by exercise, is it?
Sorry for the self-pity rant, I’m having a friggin week.
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