When I was 23 years old, I stepped on the scale at 5'9" and weighed 320 lbs. It was the largest I ever actually weighed on a scale, but I'm sure that wasn’t my heaviest. Three months later I left for Umpire school in Florida. I had always thought umpires were allowed to be fat, which couldn't have been farther from the truth. After five weeks I had lost 20lbs just due to umpiring 6 days a week with instruction. At the end of umpire school, you are hoping to get a position in minor league baseball. I was denied for one reason, my weight. It was an eye-opening experience that I wouldn't be able to pursue my dream job because I was fat. From there I dropped to 285 lbs. leading up to my summer league season and then maintained that weight because God help you losing weight on the road. I showed back up at umpire school down another 30 lbs. to 255. They almost didn't move me on due to my weight again, but knew I wanted it and that I was a talented umpire. This led to the next 8 years of my life in professional baseball. My lowest weight was 169 lbs. and that made me miserable. I had a now major league umpire turn to me and say are you even happy? My answer was a very quick no. I was hungry all the time and felt I was missing out just to keep being extremely skinny. This led to my next passion, power lifting, which allowed me to eat more, but still maintain my overall aesthetic.. Despite my newfound fitness passion, the seven-month baseball season is far too grueling and difficult to maintain your normal weight. I weighed in every year at 17X lb. weight. However, I also finished every season at 200+with one year being 215. This weight loss and gain every year a completely accidental 6-month cut followed by a six-month bulk for 5 years. By the time I was released from Double AA I had hit all my powerlifting aspirations at the 181-weight class. I overhead pressed 200lbs, benched 300, squatted 400, and deadlifted 500. The last three were all in competition. I then turned to Bodybuilding starting at 195 lbs. This was quickly derailed by covid, and I pivoted to a 4:30:39 marathon, but was now skinny fat due to the lack of lifting. It took me 9 months of being a complete hermit away from all family and friends to step onto the bodybuilding stage. The last 12 weeks were absolutely perfect eating and working out with zero binges or missed workouts. The last month of it is some of the most miserable I have ever been, but it was completely worth it. To go from a fatass 320 to a third place worthy 169 is a memory and trophy I will always cherish. My next goal was winning a strongman competition at my favorite gym (Devoted strength and fitness) one week before my competition my mother had a TBI. I still had to hit the 181 weigh in with my mother in the hospital every night wondering if she would survive the next day. I made weight and won the competition thanks to my freakishly strong shoulders. Over the next 6 months I moved home to help take care of my mother and for the first time in 10 years did not work out. I gained nearly 50lbs and was a shadow of my former self. I'm currently training for a half ironman now and have already 10 lbs. back to my goal weight of 195 for my competition.
I wrote all of this not as a self-flex or woe is me, but to show how your journey through weight loss and fitness is an eternal struggle. You will always fall off the horse. I have gained and lost the same 40 lbs. for the past ten years, and I will bet it won't be the last time as well. Even if you have fallen off your diet, suffered a family tragedy, or sustained an injury. Get your mind back to a healthier you and figure out what you need to do to get yourself healthy again. My answer is simply to find the goal I need to cross off my list. I have done it many times so it's easier for me, but I guarantee if you lost weight once the next ten times it is far easier.
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