How to know when to stop losing weight?

Hi everyone!

I've been a silent lurker in this sub for a while. All the posts about weight loss success have been so inspiring and I love reading how people achieved their own happier, healthier lives.

But a question that has been on my mind for a while now is this:

How do you know when to stop losing weight? When is it enough? And when does the pursuit of health turn into vanity?

One step back - let's put my question into relation to my own experience.

Around the start of 2020, I had lost a total of ca. 25 kg. I started at 102 kg as my highest weight in late 2018 and then steadily lost weight down to 76 kg. Currently, I weight 78 kg at 178 cm height, and this has been stable for the past 3 years. (For reference, I am now 29F.)

Losing weight changed my life, confidence, health, and social relationships for nothing but the better. I started exercising, got a bit into weight lifting and recently I've even begun running. I finally feel at home in the physical form I inhabit. I can wear the cute clothes, exercise, I can go hike and walk without being out of breath!

But I also still struggle with my weight and body image.

I was very happy with how I looked for a while.

Around half a year ago, I for some reason began looking more critically at myself. I've been trying to lose more weight ever since my weight has stagnated, ultimately aiming for a goal weight between 70-75 kg. This has been unsuccessful. I simply cannot stick to a calorie deficit for long enough and exercise makes me hungrier. But despite weight lifting, my measurements haven't changed. My waist has been a consistent 79-81 cm for years now, my hips 105-106 cm (narrowest and widest point respectively). I seem to be unable to shift these measurements at all. I don't measure my legs but it looks as if I put on muscle there, I'm unsure about this.

Now I've been wondering... when is wanting to lose more weight just pure vanity? I've been chubby or fat all my life and I don't know what I'd even look like at a lower BMI as this (BMI currently around 24.7) is the lowest one I've ever had.

I still don't like how big my stomach is and I'm also worried about the possibility of it being visceral fat.

Can someone help me evaluate how much of this is valid as genuine health concerns and how much is pure vanity? Would it be beneficial to have a BMI of 22-24 to stay "firmly" in the healthy area as I age and weight becomes harder to manage? Do I have to work unreasonably hard to lose the rest of this weight or am I doing something wrong? (I do 10k steps a day, will run twice a week now, lift weights irregularly 1-2 x full body a week) I know that food has an emotional component for me but even when I prioritise protein at 125-160g per day, I am simply starving.

Is it time to accept myself as I am, or can I push harder for my current and future health?

I hope the question makes sense and I'm so excited to hear any shared experience or opinion :)

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