I've been on a health gains journey for a long time, about 2 years (I'm choosing to not call it weight loss and I have a prior post about that, but that's largely irrelevant to this post) and I've lost about 65 pounds so far. But, I've largely stayed in the same clothes. In part, that's because most of my clothes were too small when I started this, but it's also because I was scared to move to smaller clothes too soon because I was afraid of disappointing myself.
Well, I've noticed recently that those size 14 (all US sizes) jeans that were tight on me once were falling down. I could take them on and off without even unbuttoning. I could easily grab entire fistfuls of fabric from around my thighs on jeans that were supposed to be "skinny jeans." So I decided it was time to move down to a cautious 12. Well, long story short, I ended up actually buying and fitting in a size 10.
I've felt such elation the last few days just putting on these cheap Target jeans and the size M shirt I grabbed on impulse. I think the big deal to me is that 10 is not a size you could find in a plus size store. It's "normal." When I grabbed the jeans, they were on the middle shelf. I'm so used to going to the bottom shelf or the bottom of the stack when grabbing clothes. It made me realize: I'm average. Yes I still can and should lose some more fat, but I've had the realization that I don't think someone looking at me for the first time would immediately think about my weight. Maybe they'd notice my great hair or fashion sense or the confidence with which I carry myself first.
Living as a plus size person in society is itself traumatic. From unsolicited comments in public to everything being built just a little too small to issues in building friendships and relationships. I knew that inherently, but this is the first time that I realized I might be done with that trauma. When I walk into a room, I might just be...a person, rather than a big person. I'm so happy.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/3lz7RTN
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