Between 2017 and 2020, I gained 44lbs, totally due to comfort and stress eating. I was closer to an obese BMI than I was to a healthy BMI. I also want to get married and didnt ever want to be stuck crash dieting in preparation for a wedding once my partner proposed. There wasnt a final atraw for me, but none of my clothes fit and one day my GP said 'Mark...you're looking...big'. She meant it in a nice way, concerned. But oof. So I just...started losing weight.
But it was different this time because I set myself some ground rules: 1. I dont need to rush 2. I only fail if I give up 3. A plateau or maintaining is still progress compared to my habits in the past. My ground rules helped me stop feeling so overwhelmed and I found it a lot easier to diet.
I finally got regular at the gym, training twice a week with a trainer. I stalled in my weight loss and didnt even try for maybe 5 months of last year too. It was extremely stressful, I was misdiagnosed with a melanoma, my dog died, I developed vertigo, I got quite sick several times... I also have a chronic illness which is painful so in the past I found it hard to stay motivated.
What is amazing though is that in the past, I would have comfort eaten through all of it, and this time I didnt! I would have absolutely gained weight from that horrible time has this been 2020. I kept telling mysef...ok I am not trying to lose right now, I just have to maintain. And it worked! I also did a lot of therapy last year and I think it was the thing that helped me finally change. I do roughly count calories but I dont actually log them, so I am surprised I have had success. I also dont have cheat days, but sometimes I ate foods that are a bit off track. I never felt too deprived. I find it I plan to 'cheat', I fixate on it. Whereas when I had a treat when it just came up and I felt like it was ok, I went for it. I also treated myself to different foods. Previously I didnt buy fresh fruit as it felt too expensive, but last year I finally just let myself have it as a treat when I craved aweet foods. I really ended up enjoying it and at this point, I think I prefer strawberries and blueberries to ice cream which is unexpected. I do have a history of anorexia pre-2017, which is why I work hard to be relaxed and slow with my weight loss.
I wish I had known that if I just stopped panicking and started to accept myself and my journey, I would be so much happier and be able to lose weight. But I have learned my lesson now.
Thank you so much, loseit. I have lurked here since Feb 2021 and this sub has helped me so much! It feels so good to finally have lost enough weight to feel warranted posting my progress. Also it helps lurking here and aharing because I still know a lot of people who never recovered from anorexia and always berated me for wanting to lose weight. I was overweight!! Anyway I understand they're going through a lot. It is just nice to feel comfoetable to share with people who get it =)
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