Just to give a bit of background, I'm 22, I'm approximately 213 lbs. Thats a big deal for me because I'm only 5' tall and according to every calculator in existence, my BMI is a whopping 44, which qualifies as morbidly obese.
I grew up with a mom that was overly conscious of what we kids were eating, sometimes even commenting on our weight and that we needed to be "eating better." I know she meant well, but I am convinced it was damaging to me, as I saw eating junk food as a way to "rebel" against her. As I gained more freedom in what I ate, I also gained weight. I also went through a crap ton of emotional turmoil, with numerous deaths of friends and family, friends walking out on me, struggles with my ADHD and autism (as far as social situations go, whenever I felt lonely or overwhelmed, I found solace in the snack table, cringe I know, someone I used to call a friend commented negatively on this habit).
I have tried and failed so many different diets, including, but not limited to, carb cycling, weight watchers, calorie counting, calorie counting again, (complex recipes are so hard to calculate), intermittent fasting, restricting and binging, the "see-how-long-I-can-go-without-eating," and so on. So far, I have found nothing that works long term.
I just started a new job that makes me move around a lot, and for a while I was losing weight. (Though only a few pounds). I had a week off, and despite my efforts to eat intuitively, I gained those pounds back.
I'm just feeling really discouraged right now. People in other subs tell me to "just lose weight" but they don't realize how hard I have fought, because I have nothing to show for it. Also, both of my parents have lost weight and weigh less than me now. You heard right, I even weigh more than my own father. I am also not very attractive, so I feel like weight loss is the only thing that will make anyone give me the time of day. At this point I've kinda submitted to the reality of me being the "fat funny friend" because I swear I can't envision myself being anything else.
Thanks for listening to my rant, advice is welcome, but please be kind.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/W5JpVMd
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