Tuesday, October 20, 2020

Doctor wants me on HMR program, need advice, possibly a rant

Ok. I really need some perspective here because I can't tell if I'm reacting so strongly because I am feeling personally attacked or because there's a genuine reason to.

I'm 5', 167 pounds. I am obese, although no one who I say that to who looks at me thinks it's true. I eat at 1330 calories a day, training for a half marathon and ran 10 5k's in the last six months and I haven't lost a pound. I've been trying to standardize my meals more so I can track them easier but I've just fluctuated around the same weight no matter what. No measurement movement either.

I went to see my doc today for something unrelated (I have a UTI, wooo) and my weight came up. I told her how I'm concerned that despite my efforts nothing is happening. She asked what I eat, how much I eat. I told her I have a protein shake and snack for lunch (300 calories) and then my fiance and I cook dinner at about 1000 calories each night. I also do IF, mostly because I don't like breakfast and if I eat after 7pm I can't sleep.

She told me my dinners were too much and that I should get on the HMR program and basically have 800 calories in shakes for 12 weeks and that I wasn't trying hard enough. She also mentioned possibly increasing my adderall dose, but I think that was a joke? The program is run out of the hospital with weekly dietician visits, so it is medically supervised.

Something just feels wrong to me. I don't know if I'm reacting so negatively because of her attitude (this isn't my first issue with her. She also said my random intermittent chest pain was from anxiety.... Still no idea why it happens) or because this program genuinely scares me. I'm sure it would work. She's apparently doing it and has lost 25 pounds in 7 weeks. There's also a Phase 2 where they help you build a diet to maintain and keep the weight off.

I'm just.... Someone tell me if this is crazy? Has anyone here done it? It just seems like a crash diet. But if my doctor is recommending it to me, is it my best option? I'm just really emotional right now. She told me that for some people calorie counting and exercise isn't enough. I always thought I could beat the genetics of my fat family with enough effort but what if making myself miserable for 12 weeks is the only way?

Tl;dr doctor suggested I try an extreme medically supervised weight loss program because I am obese. Can't tell if my negative reaction is because I don't want it to be true or because there's actually something hinky going on.

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