Hello there! A lot of things in my life are going pretty well right now. I've recently pulled out of a several year long bout of depression, I've killed over $20k in debt and am on track to be completely debt free except for my mortgage by age 30, I got a great new job with awesome benefits, I've got some really exciting travel plans coming up, and in general I'm just feeling pretty good about the trajectory of my life.
However I've never felt in control of or proud of my body. My skin is too pink and blotchy, my hair is consistently too greasy at my roots and dry at my ends, my teeth are too crooked, my eyes are too sensitive, my posture is too hunched over, my facial expressions are too ingenuine, and my weight is too high.
I'm getting ready to start a weight loss journey. I am currently [F] 5'4" and 164 lbs. and I want to lose 44 lbs. by August. I have been telling myself I'll start losing weight for the last 10+ years. Every day I think tomorrow is the day. It never is. I research the hell out of weight loss regimens. Constantly putting together meal plans, trying to find ways to make exercise fun, etc. I have the knowledge of how it's done, but not the courage to go out into the world and do it. I don't really care about being strong or perfect. I just want to be above-average levels of healthy in terms of weight, cardiovascular health, diet, etc. And I love rock climbing and want to get better at that and being smaller and lighter will certainly benefit me.
I have never experienced any body-related trauma, but I absolutely HATE having a body and anything related to having a body. I hate exercise, brushing my teeth, having to wash myself daily, using the bathroom. I even hate stereotypically good things that bodies can experience, like sex, massages, pedicures, etc. I guess my brain just doesn't feel fully synced up to my body. It just feels like my body is an awkward taxi to transport my brain places. So who knows if this whole "taking care of my body" thing will truly stick. But I wanted to put it all out there in case anyone has advice, words of encouragement, etc.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2SQly3I
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