And I guess I’m still not. I’ve lost 40 pounds and it feels really great to know that it’s actually happening, for the first time in my life I’m actually sticking to something and losing weight. But i feel like a cheater, I’m not inspiring. I have been so depressed and stressed and a lot of my weight loss has come from essentially starving myself. It makes me feel really stupid that I can’t do this the healthy way. Truth be told, a lot of it has just been about control, a game to see how long I can go without eating. But it’s also making me lose weight which is a plus. I know its Bad Weight Loss. I know all that. But I just can’t seem to stop. I have 100 pounds to go towards my goal but I’m about a third of the way there and it feels so good. I wish it didn’t but it does. I feel disgusting anytime I eat anything. Sorry about this, i just someone to hear me. I know people here only really talk about the progress on their healthy weight loss, it almost feels like I shouldn’t even post this here.
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