Could really use some encouragement...

Hi all! I'm really sorry if this is long, but here goes.

So I've been having a horrible week recently and I could really just use some encouragement from people going through what I am. I'm 5'0", 25F, and currently on a weight loss journey. My highest weight was 250lbs, but it’s been a slow and steady decline with dieting; I haven't gone to the gym since quarantine and my self-loathing's gotten to the point where I am terrified to go outside for walks and runs like I used to. Despite this, I've gone from 250lbs to 209lbs.

My need for encouragement right now is because I think I've hit a plateu? My weight just won't budge, and when I checked on the scale today, I went up 2lbs (and for full transparency, I've only been eating one meal a day and it's usually very calorie heavy; thanks, depression!). I start my first ever meal prep session tomorrow to kick myself back on track.

I know this whole thing is a journey and a process, and I think that re-adding exercise to my lifestyle will help with the plateu but... I've struggled with an eating disorder, depression, and body dysmorphic disorder for a very long time, and my obsessive thinking has been on a roll sonce I hit the plateu. I've cried at least once a day, and I felt awful and depressed when I saw the scale went up 2lbs.

So yeah, I could really use some positive encouragement right now; advice is super welcome as well, I always welcome new knowledge from wherever I can find it.

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