Its been a hard week, just wanted to share.

This week has been one of the yuckiest weeks all year for me and my relationship with food. My stomach feels like it doesn't exist - that everything that goes into my body just passes wonderfully over my tongue and then directly into the void. I don't feel full, I don't feel hungry. I'm only eating because I'm looking for that little happy feeling it gives me. But its so very temporary and is immediately replaced by the sad feelings knowing that I'm making it harder to carry my body around and do the things I love doing in the long run. On paper, it doesn't take much effort to start reaping the long term benefits. When I am actually doing cico and eating healthy, I start to feel sustainably better both emotionally and physically in just a few days. But in reality the effort that it takes to break the cycle of immediate rewards seems so unobtainable in the thick of it. Newton's first law I guess. Before posting, I re-read this section of the FAQ. It was very affirming of the struggle I'm experiencing and encouraging to read, and I recommend giving it a read if you find what I'm going through relatable.

On the bright side/ moving forward:

1. I am in therapy and binge eating is one of the things we discuss at that has been helpful. I know that I'm always only <2 week away from having a talk with someone who is very skilled at helping me help myself.
2. I wanted to share something that I read here about a year ago that has always stuck with me, especially in times like this. I don't remember the exact phrasing the redditor used, but they essentially talked about an important step in weight loss being the realization that you need to feed your body, not your emotions. Reading that comment was an epiphany moment for me. I hadn't realized that was what I had been doing all along until then, nor had it ever really clicked until then that giving my body the right fuel was a worthwhile endeavor. Maybe if I share that here it'll reach someone else at the right time too.

I'm excited to get back to a good place. Maybe not today, but soon.

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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/34mGztn