Begin again. And again and again and again.

TL;DR: How do you stay motivated or find fresh motivation?

Hi friends. I've been an on and off lurker on this sub for awhile now. I lost right around 45 pounds over the course of a year with the help of Noom and my new-found love for myself that I gained after getting rid of the worst boyfriend I've ever had. I won't get into the long story of my life, struggling with weight for the majority it. I'll skip over all that and just cover the last two years.

In my year of weight loss what worked for me was:

-Using Noom. It helped immensely with understanding behavior chains, the psychological effects of weight loss, breaking behavior patterns, dealing with emotional triggers and just generally re-learning how to eat.

-Using a food scale! Wow, does that put portions into perspective like never before.

-Celebrating every small victory instead of focusing on 'failures'.

-Ditching the diet mentality and embracing lifestyle change, which also means ditching the 'on' or 'off' mindset to eating and exercise.

-Embracing my biggest motto - 'begin again'. So you blew your calorie budget today? Begin again. Ate a doughnut? Begin again. Missed the gym? Begin again. Just keep beginning over and over and over.

-Walking! Way more enjoyable than running and something silly like 70% as effective a calorie burn. (Don't quote me on that figure.)

-Simply BELIEVING that I could. Wow that goes a long way.

I lost 45 pounds and I've maintained for just over a year. Something about watching my body change so drastically and being the smallest I've EVER BEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE scared me and I decided to take a break to get used to my new body for a minute. Also, CICO fatigue. It's real.

Now, the real reason I'm here - what I'm currently struggling with and would love y'alls advice on:

Finding the will to start tracking CICO again. I'm ready to begin again and finally reach that lofty goal I once thought was impossible. I'm having a hard time getting back to tracking calories again because time in the kitchen is like therapy for me. It's also my most enjoyed creative outlet. I feel like tracking and weighing everything, while helpful and undoubtedly effective, ruins that for me. Cooking becomes more like a chore, takes me out of the flow state, kills some of my creative process. Do any of you struggle with this? How do you deal with it?

I'm also posting because I'd like to start engaging more with this community as a means to not only hold myself accountable and keep my focus on this process, but to also give back to a community that has helped me in the past. Hence the username.

Thanks for reading and responding if you so choose.

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