I am 16, 5'2" and weigh 140 lbs. More than two years ago I had serious disordered eating issues. I would binge due to stress, feel guilty, then try to compensate by fasting for days which my therapist thought (not official diagnosis) was bulimia. I attended then quit therapy after weeks of nothing working. For the past few years I have been dieting on and off again.
Those issues went away for a while until this summer. Right now, I want to lose at least twenty pounds as it has been a goal of mine since fifth grade and right now I am overweight. I lost 5 pounds after starting at 145. Everything was great and I ate healthy, had apples for snacks, was eating chicken beef and salmon and all around aproaching weight loss in a very fresh and healthy way. I weighed myself daily and was very happy to see the number on the scale decrease. Then I ate some dessert to celebrate and when I saw the number increase it all got messy from there.
Right now I don't really know if I'm eating too much because it doesn't seem like that to me. I don't have breakfast and eat lunch and dinner in small bowls. The other day I had 1000 calories total and what I ate most days this week is around that.
Today the number on the scale increased a few ounces. I thought it could be because of dinner and it might be because I have been doing strength training w/ kettlebells, but I'm afraid that might not be the case. I haven't been losing much now even though I've really been trying so hard. Today I've eaten only a little--the equivalent of a small meal.
I feel very faint and weak, but I am afraid of eating. I know this mindset is wrong but I want to lose weight and eating with a normal deficit and exercising isn't working. Is there something wrong I'm doing or do i have to wait more for results? I don't want to see a therapist. I want to solve this somehow. Is there anything in particular I should avoid or do?
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